Personal, Diary

Note To Self: Farewell 2020

Dear Self,

As 2020’s about to end. I would like to congratulate you for doing the things you never thought you could do and learn the valuable lesson of acceptance.

For years, I know you’ve been struggling to move on, of letting things go.
For years, you’ve been holding on to the glory days of the past, of how things would’ve turned great if you choose the latter.
For years, you’ve been reminiscing the great times that you once had, and been holding back to move forward.
For years, throwback Thursdays were not only on Thursdays but they were on your mind rent-free.
For years, you’ve shed a tear of how things would turn out differently. You’ve been living in the world of what if’s.

You made wrong choices of hurting the ones you love this year,
hurting the one who loves you unconditionally.
You made irrational choices despite the world going in shambles.

However, you remained strong despite all of that.
The luck was on your side when the world struggled with the greens.
And your sole time became your time to reflect and realize that

And you did.
You were no longer holding back.
You were no longer wishing to turn back time.
You let go of the past.
You were not holding on to throwbacks anymore.
You let go of the glory days, but instead, you’re now looking forward to new glorious days.

No longer there were tears for what if’s
No longer there were tears for the old you
No longer there were tears for what you would’ve become.
No longer there were tears whenever you watch dramas that could relate to your “if only’s”

You accepted your fate.
You accepted the reality.
You accepted what’s going on now.
You accepted what you should be embracing.

And I think that’s why the world’s rewarding you now.
You were able to stand stronger.
You were able to sleep on the best nest you’ve ever laid on.
You were able to surprise Mom with treats here and there
and the best of all —
You felt genuinely happy.

I know there were doubts and worries about the consequences of the mistakes you made just to learn this lesson,
but I believe you are now stronger, and you are ready to face whatever it is that you will have to face.

Today, we say ONWARDS!
And I hope we continue to sail forward.

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